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What am I to be?


By Jasmin Toubi


What am I to be?
I know I am to be,
But to be what?
To be special and different and all to myself?
Am I to be something to change the way everyone sees and thinks and feels?
Or to be something that just sees and thinks and feels?
Or to be something that just is?
I hardly believe I’m just to be.
Of course I was born to be,
But not to be period.
I must be something-someone.
I’m to be myself, yes, but what does that mean?
What defines myself?
I’m to be the best I can, yes, but how do you define something who’s only description is to be?
You don’t.
I’m to be for what?
For myself?
For everyone?
For the greater purpose that leaves us all here wandering and searching for nearly lifetimes?
Why must I be?
Is there any other choice?
If you are not being then you simply are not.
You do not exist.
I exist and I am to be but what and for what and why I still don’t know.
Will I ever?
I don’t know.
What is there left to do then?
To be.
Toubi.

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